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Lessons In Brokenness (Remastered)

by Subsist

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1.
This day has no room for us. No idle time found for a thorn in the side. They'll have not of this. Well then throw away the beauty of it all. Throw aside the truest nuances, that inner pride and joy deemed foolishness. Wishful thinking to have a mind unabashed by societal well-being. Live it all and die trying before a small taste of wasted years. And this year has no room for us. To gain control by acting on emotion. Looking to the mirror to gain redemption. Acting out dreams far forgotten in those tortured four to ten years after the hell you said you'd never repeat. Mocking us for taking some of the marrow. Fighting a losing battle. And you say this world has no room for us.
2.
Prosthesis 03:37
I take a new grip with these tired hands. Tears of failure beget lessons in brokenness. Resemblance of a child learning to stand upon these shaky legs, each step a milestone in existence. This understanding void of completeness, and the pestilence of a fallen world hollows the souls of the doubting, leaving them nothing. The promise of atonement satiates my fear. Malignant unbelief searches the hearts of all. Cancerous by nature, consuming the week, nurturing their hatred, leaving them nothing. We musn't relinquish. We cannot loosen our grip. Putting aside this understanding that cannot be attained, I press on toward the sanctity of this faith. Slaughtering the hindrance of doubt, believing the unseen, leaving self behind, my hope rages on unscathed by doubt.
3.
With faultered lips a heart's relentless cry goes out once more. Search and know and test this servant's heart. Break this feeble self down. Restoration within my spirit. Cleanse and consume this blemished soul with yourself. Fill me completely, then I am yours. You are my solace, my only comfort. Guilt enshrouded lonliness I now face. To you I cry out and you answer. A stronghold in times of despair, a refuge from this life's impending rejection. By your mercy you took my guilt when you bore my suffering. In your sheltering arms, I am made knew, protected from affliction. So unworthy of the peace you granted freely, a torn and tattered self my only gift. Complete surrender, shattered life I bring. Carried solely to be laid at your feet.
4.
Evil only exists out of necessity. If there is to be love there must also be hate. For why would god create a mindless mass, force them to love him and do his will. Would that be freedom would that be real love? You want your freedom yet you blame god when someone else's freedom crosses your path. If you can't handle the price to be free outside of god you're on your own. Everything is justifiable in the eyes of humanity. The freedom I have is from a love that did not bind me in form of rape. A love that took a risk on my creation, a risk that I may not love back, a freedom that lets me live for myself and my god bound by nothing poured blood can't cover. If it wasn't for blood I wouldn't be free to love, and you wouldn't be free to hate me for my faith. And you wouldn't want that freedom taken from you.
5.
Indelible 03:26
Arrogant. Inconsiderate. Unwarranted hate. Overgeneralized. The X is branded on our hearts. Our passion is to break the bottle, to breathe life into charred lungs, and to suppress substance abuse. But we are condemned for our faith in god, a god who is pro-straightedge. We are separated and called religious. Mainstream religion hates us too. It's the ethic that matters and not your hate. Petty differences divide, fall. Ignite the passion that started it all. Ethnocentric, subculture. Question the reason you hate me.
6.

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Remaster 2018

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released December 29, 2018

Remastered by Benjamin Evan Walker

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Subsist Peoria, Illinois

Subsist was always a stubbornly hard-working hardcore band from America’s heartland, as musically volatile and extreme as the Midwestern weather that shrouded them. Formed in the mid-90’s in Peoria, Illinois, the band was fiercely loved, touring and sharing the stage with bands like Coalesce, Converge, the Dillinger Escape Plan, Cave In, Eighteen Visions, and Burn It Down. ... more

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